Madame Johanna & the Things She Do
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A letter to a Park Ave idiot

8/23/2018

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**The events described in this letter took place on a hot afternoon on August 12th, 2018**
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Dear random grown man who decided to take time out of his day to tell me I should be “ashamed” for putting my daughter in yoga pants,


Before I begin, I just have to say it: wow! You must really be passionate about the moral backbone of this city! To take precious time out of your day to share that passion really speaks to your dedication. Your several presumably much younger and already more successful roommates must be in such awe of your moral stamina. Still, it must have been a tiring day in your battle for the future of Rochester’s heart, because you walked away before you could do much more than tell me how ashamed I should be and bark a couple of lazy way-to-go-Mommy’s at me and the six-year-old I was with. If you had stuck around, you might have learned the whole story.
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    Mme. Johanna is a gaudy jewelry and baby possum enthusiast. This ambitious 30-something woman can often be found declining event invites on Facebook and losing interest in whatever latest hobby her newly diagnosed ADHD has hyperfocused on while she drinks wine on her couch, accompanied by her beloved dog, Dorothy Barker.

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